Struggling to conceive? Here are some things to consider

Expanding your family is one of the most exciting things you can look forward to in adulthood. That being said, the fertility journey is not always the easiest and can be different for everyone. Some may be fortunate enough to get pregnant within their first couple of months of trying to conceive. However, for others, after a year of unsuccessful attempts, you may experience feelings of discouragement, failure, worry, and anxiety. This can often leave couples to wonder what’s next, what can we do differently, or are we even able to conceive? Because fertility can be a wild ride and challenging to navigate, let’s dive into some things you and your partner should consider thinking about when trying to conceive. 

How is Your Reproductive Health? 

Most of the time, we prioritise our physical health more than our mental or reproductive health, for example. But when you are struggling to conceive, it’s important to look into and learn about your reproductive health with the help of your physician. 

Women face difficulty with their menstrual cycles, hormones, reproductive health, and more. On top of this, women can be diagnosed with endometriosis or polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS), making it even more difficult to conceive. Unfortunately, there is no cure for either of these conditions. These conditions can greatly impact the ability of women to conceive easily and can bring on severe pain, depression, hair loss, and menstrual cycle difficulties. If you experience some of these symptoms, visit your doctor to discuss more and get checked out. While there is currently no cure for either of these, there are ways you can help to manage some of the symptoms and start to live a healthy lifestyle. Try out supplements for PCOS or supplements for endometriosis to start balancing your well-being and maybe start trying to conceive again. 

Because of conditions like PCOS and endometriosis, it’s a common misconception that a couple cannot conceive because of fertility issues from the woman. However, it is possible for both men and women to have fertility problems. Because of this, it’s suggested that both you and your partner schedule a visit with your doctor to talk about all things regarding your reproductive health. Doing this will help get you one step closer to finding out some answers on why you are struggling to conceive. Through this time, remember that you and your partner are a team. Be there for each other through this challenging period and never blame one another. Once you have discussed with your doctor the pinpointed reason you are struggling to conceive, consider coming up with a game plan together. Sitting down and talking through this with your partner can help to decrease any stress or anxious feelings you both may have.

How Can This Effect Your Mental Health? 

Struggling with infertility can have a significant impact on your mental health, especially when your original plan to bring a child into this world has changed. Falling into depression or experiencing anxiety and panic can happen when you have not been successful at trying to conceive. Emotions like hopelessness, frustration, guilt, and worthlessness can commonly be felt when you’re struggling with fertility. The fertility journey is unique for everyone. It is hard to stay positive and always look on the bright side when this situation is challenging and extremely stressful. 

That is why you need to utilise different resources to cope with your emotions. If you are looking for advice or to bond with people going through the same thing, finding a support group near you can be extremely beneficial to you and your partner. This is a great way to talk about your feelings, find out about different treatment options, and socialise. This journey can be isolating, so getting out and having conversations with others can help you feel like you’re not alone in this journey. If your feelings are more serious and are impacting your quality of life, give online treatment for depression and anxiety a try. Talking with a mental health professional will allow you to get an objective point of view, someone to listen to you, give you appropriate support and suggest coping strategies. 

What Can You Do? 

Depending on what your doctor says there are many options for how you can try to have a child. If your doctor has determined that your struggles with conceiving are not related to infertility, they might suggest that you step back and take a look at the lifestyle you are living. After reflecting on your current lifestyle and healthy habits, you can decide what changes need to be made in order to increase your chances of being able to conceive. It is worth discussing these options with your doctor or a medical professional before making any major lifestyle changes. 

For example, it is extremely important for you to stop any and all drug use. Not only is that habit very damaging to your health and body, but it can make it difficult for you to get pregnant. This habit is also not safe and can be damaging to your child if you are able to conceive. Cutting out smoking, drug use and alcohol can be challenging for those who are dependent on them. If this is the case, try finding a program that can help you. 

Other lifestyle habits that might be making it harder to conceive are your eating habits and your weight. Being overweight or underweight can have an impact on your ability to conceive. You can also have a harder time if your eating habits are poor, for example, if your diet is unhealthy or if you are not eating enough. You can follow a fertility diet that will suggest the best foods to eat when you are trying to get pregnant. 

If simple lifestyle changes are not the reason why you are having trouble becoming pregnant but instead your doctor has found a fertility issue, consider your options for other ways you can welcome a child into your life. Discuss with your partner and doctor fertility treatment options like IVF. Fertility treatments can be a struggle and a long process, and might not always work, but it is something you can look into. You can also consider adoption as a way to expand your family. Take your time thinking about this decision and how you and your partner would like to proceed. Get second opinions, read the research, and talk to others who have gone through similar experiences. Find something that is comfortable and fitting for your family. 

Trying to conceive and not being successful can have lasting effects. Not only will you feel the many emotions of going through this journey, but you may also question your worth and the future of what your family could look like. Take these tips into consideration so you aren’t left wondering if you are able to conceive. Determine why you are having difficulties so you can take action. Lean on your partner, your family, friends, and medical professionals during this journey. And most importantly, don’t give up. You are not in this alone and there are many resources for you to utilise and help you through this journey.

Looking for more advice? Ask away in our Full Stop FB group, or reach out to the team on IG at @itsyoppie so we can help. 

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